Tanya and I were invited to be the co-speakers at Malibu Discipleship Weekend in late May. In fact, that was how I spent my 50th birthday. So worth it.
What we shared was a greatest hits album of what God has been revealing to us over the past 4 years. A combination of lessons from mentors in our lives, and how God's word that has grabbed hold of us (Ephesians 2:8-10, Romans 8, Philippians 4,) and elements of neuroscience; how God shapes even our brains to align with what He has to say to us.
Interested yet? This may become a manuscript for something in the future, who knows!
Tanya spoke night 1 (while I was in Tri-Cities coaching our Mead HS boys tennis team to 2nd place in the state championship.). She shared about how we are God's masterpiece, his workmanship, whom He delights in and planned to do great works in and through. She crushed it, because she has lived what she spoke.
Night 2 I shared from what I have been deeply moved by over the past years, inviting them on this journey for themselves.
Recapping Tanya said, we truly are God's masterpieces, but we often feel like master pieces of crap if we are honest. Our minds are filled with negative self-talk and beliefs that drag us down from our true identity God gives us.
I shared about how my job on the Mead Tennis team coaching staff is *mindset coaching; identifying our players' negative self-talk and replacing it with affirmations of identity and clarity. Every player shared and did not realize how plagued they were, yet how possible changing is. I asked the high schoolers in the room if they have experienced this same negative self talk that has impacted them. The lights were low, but looked like at least 95% raised their hands. They get it. They hear the constant negativity.
The question was posed..."who's voice is that coming from?"
I took a risk and did a 3 minute history of God's voice, from Genesis 1 to Old Testament invitations over and over to 'come to me', to Jesus, and literally to God speaking this very day.
Then I did a 3 minute history of 'the accuser', Satan's voice. From Genesis 3 ('Did God realllllly sayyyy...?') to the temptation of Jesus, evil seen in the bible and Revelation to literally this morning when certian thoughts of shame, comparison, self-hatred or bitterness entered their brains. Real stuff.
Then I shared the story that rocked me.
I met with Psychologist, Dr Tim, to share about how burnt out I had become as an area director, and lost energy to lead leaders, invite people and overcome my feeling of being so alone. Dr. Tim asked which specific words ran through my mind, and when. I repeatedly had these scripts running through my mind: "No one really wants to help lead. Its better that you do all the work. You burden people when you invite them to take on leadership. You're faulty and not a good fit as a leader, you just do things wrong. Why even bother being a director." As I shared, he leaned in and asked, "who's voice is that?" He paused and waited a few moments. I was stunned, I had never considered the question. He pressed, since I had not answered yet. Is that God's voice, is that consistent to how He speaks to us? Sobered, I finally answered; "that is the voice of the accuser. Satan. Speaking half-believable lies."
Dr Tim continued: "May I ask, have you been obedient to that voice? And how long?" I was stopped in my tracked. Awakened as if a Great Wolf Lodge water bucket with ice water just dumped over my head. I realized in that moment that negative self-talk is real, and it has a source, and it is not from God. It must be addressed and it can be done!
What comes next is good news. That our mindsets and mental messes may be jacked up, but God is fully able to reshape us, like clay. Jeremiah 18 shares this relationship between God, our shaper and sculpter, and us the misshapen clay. When we get out of alignment, mentally, spiritually, it is nothing to God to simply reshape what is the marred. This is good news, no need to sulk or shame storm or feel like a hopeless lost cause. God is able to re-shape us.
It fit to share about research in neuroscience. With all of our negative self-talk and thought patterns we have, our brains have formed neuropathways that are deeply formed and hard to change old mindsets that we have thought, believed and even obeyed as truth. Yet, our brains are so resillent and reshapeable. We can train our brains, with new thoughts beliefs, to form a new pathway in a phenomenon called neuroplasticity. The "clay" metaphor absolutely fits how God made our brains with the way they can be reshaped. I shared how it works. Replace the lie or negative talk with a truth, a positive, emotionally compelling statement, and begin to speak it out, believe it and keep repeating it daily. This repetition is similar to what God has said all along in scripture, to meditate day and night on God's word, to write it on doorframes, to share it with our children and their children. God all along was a mental health expert who wanted us to know and believe the truth, not lies.
SO many of these kids were familiar with neuroscience and it blew their gourds to combine this with God's word, so applicable and yet so simple. They were given ample time to have solitude, listen to God's voice and begin to re-route neuropathways of God's words.
I have a laminated page full of affirmations, truths and scripture that I review regularly to align my brain with truth and fix my thoughts on 'whatever is true, right, lovely, excellent and praiseworthy' (Philippians 4.). SO many scriptures point towards meditating on and memorizing the word, keeping it in front of us, not forgetting, teaching our kids, and Jesus had truth locked in when being tempted. Its a God theme!
More to say, but that was the summary.
*I have been learning from a mentor, Brad Board, a sage on this topic where he learned from presenting for the Pacific Institute for years for positive change in how we can transform our lives through beliefs and thoughts. He's helped me do mindset coaching for myself and my tennis players, and any YL staff who desire this support to.
